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I’m sorry that I’m going all emo lately


I’m sorry that I’m going all emo lately (and of course in this post).

After all these times wondering and searching of what my forte is, I finally know what I’m good at. I’m apparently really good at running away from my problems. It’s not that I didn’t know about it, I think it’s just I finally admit it. And boy, the price I have to pay…  So far I’ve managed to (barely) escape from the problems I had with minimum damage, probably a pure luck. And I guess I run out of luck now. There’s nothing else I could do beside what I really should do a long time ago, facing my own problems.

Sometimes I wish life were just like movies when everything would fall into place in the end. Somehow there’s an invisible hand that would show you the way out (well in my life there’s probably one but since it’s invisible I couldn’t see it). Or this one big great solution that would come up without you have to think hard about it. But life is not a movie and I’m just a lazy ass and a coward to face my own problems. 

Some other times I wish I could fast forward my life to the time when my problems are (miraculously) solved. Yes, I’m that lazy ass and that coward.

And then I would start to think about a back up plan or an exit strategy. Surprise surprise… I couldn’t find one (or something I would be brave enough to do).

So yeah, here I am mustering up my courage to face my problems.

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